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The following originally appeared
in Car & Driver and was reprinted in The Windmill, Vol.
II, No. 5, dated Nov./Dec., 1971. Yates is my favorite columnist.
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There is no sense kidding myself. After I shuck
away all those fumblings for tolerance and earnest attempts
to separate personal lifestyle from public achievement, Ralph
Nader remains a pain in the ass. Yeah, I know he's one man against
the Establishment, selflessly grappling with the cheaters, con-men
and land-rapers who run big business and the political hacks
and ward-heelers who infest Washington. Give Ralph his head
and he'll save us all from being pillaged and poisoned by a
thousand menaces that lurk everywhere from the supermarket shelves
to your car's glove compartment. To be sure, it's very nice
of him to go to all that trouble for you and me, but pardon
me for saying so, he's still a pain in the ass.
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Zealots of all kinds concern me. Marcel Proust made
one of the most profound warnings I can imagine when he said, "Love
those who seek the truth: beware of those who find it." Ralph Nader
has found truth, albeit a sweeping , hyperbolic, paranoid kind of truth
that sees a deceit-veiled business world sucking on the veins of a stupid,
gluttonous public devoid of perception, discretion, or taste. I am wary
of him. Remember this; nobody does anything for nothing. Even the most
selfless humanitarian operates for a deep psychic satisfaction that
transcends conventional material rewards, but is nonetheless compensation.
Albert Schweitzer dug the jungle. On the surface, Ralph Nader appears
to be a purely motivated crusader without any personal ambitions whatsoever.
Quite to the contrary, I think he's on the biggest trip of all—a power
trip; that exquisite sensation of making people jump. Ralph Nader is
an important man. Some say he wields as much personal power as any private
citizen in Washington—the biggest little man in town—and if you don't
think that is perfect payment to the right kind of drab, barren personality,
there's no sense reading any further.
So let's dispense with that crap about Nader operating
as an altruistic ombudsman in the world of commerce. It has been proven
time and again that the guys who drive for the top aren't after the
money or the fame; it's the power they want. This is the case with everybody
from Henry Ford to Howard Hughes. Money and fame are merely tokens to
be parlayed in the power game. In Nader's case he has used a denial
of material gain to compound power, not diminish it. Much as Greta Garbo
has remained famous by seeking obscurity, Nader has gathered great strength
by playing a rag-tag David in the face of corporate Goliaths.
This backdoor entry into the corridors of power has
worked so well that Nader now reposes in a position where no one has
the guts to assault him. Why? Because any criticism whatsoever indelibly
labels you as the running dog of the Big Gov-Biz conspiracy that is
out to destroy us. With a demagogue like Nader—and make no mistake about
it, Ralph Nader is a classic demagogue—it is critical that he be surrounded
by conspiracies, that every act of foolishness and incompetence be interpreted
as a finely woven pattern of vicious deceit. Therefore General Motors
never simply errs by making an imperfect car, it consciously markets
a lethal junker and then goes to elaborate lengths to conceal its deadly
qualities from the buying public. The natural gas transmission companies
build weak pipes for the simple pleasure of watching houses full of
orphans blow up: meat packers get insane kicks from selling housewives
rotten liverwurst: all industrialists find pollution a profitable adjunct
in their campaign to rule America, and so on. There is no compromise
with a demagogue. You are with him or against him. And in the case of
Ralph Nader, opposition places you squarely among the army of villains
that he, with the unique perception provided by him and his schoolboy
lawyers (who also get powerful ego compensation in lieu of pay), has
self-righteously pin-pointed. Argue against him and you are giving tacit
aid and comfort to the presumed enemies of mankind.
Frankly I don't give a damn what Ralph Nader says or
thinks about me. If my criticism makes me an enemy of mankind by his
definition, so be it. All I know is that I've listened to him maunder
on and on, making the widest, wildest accusations with only modest concern
for accuracy or accountability. He may be the biggest junk producer
of all! Yet nobody has said a word in opposition, except for one senator
who, after publicly hearing Nader claim that a multitude of companies
were guilty of outright criminal acts, suggested rather briskly that
he quit yapping about it and go get legal indictments through the conventional
process of law. Ralph lumbered on to another subject, as I recall.
Even if I were able to overlook his monk-like lifestyle
and his utter absence of a sense of humor (about which I am extremely
suspicious in any man) I would view Ralph Nader as essentially anti-social
for a number of reasons. Foremost, it involves his attempt to establish
himself as a national messiah, with a central message to the American
public that says, "Listen America, I am going to show you what dupes
and dummies you are for buying all that poisonous crap." He is arrogantly
patronizing as are all zealots. Nader knows more that the average
man. He has greater perception, greater self-discipline and a broader
understanding of life. Therefore he is able to see what we can't see;
to save us where we poor fools can't save ourselves.
Quite to the contrary, I think a healthy percentage
of Americans are quite aware of their strengths and deficiencies, and
at least seem capable, without the aid of Mr. Nader, to buy the right
brand of pantyhose or corn flakes without killing themselves. In fact,
there is an uncanny underground of information about products in the
U.S. If you don't believe it, bug a women's bridge club or stand around
a gas station for a while. The word-of-mouth passage about good and
bad merchandise is amazing Of course there are the dummies; the suckers
for price and unscrupulous promotion and they will remain as easy marks
always eager to be exploited.
We can protect the fools only in a rigidly controlled
marketplace. That I believe is what Ralph Nader seeks, at least unconsciously.
Nader's ultimate satisfaction—at least in the area of consumer affairs—would
come, I'm sure, in being able to make personal judgments over which
products would be sold and which wouldn't; over which company would
live and which would die.
I might be willing to grant him some credibility, even
authority, in this area if he hadn't been so grossly inaccurate in his
assessment of the automobile industry. That farcical but destructive
assault was so vicious, so frenzied and so utterly off target that it
has scarred Nader's reputation in my opinion. If he was that wrong about
automobiles, how can anybody be sure his facts are any clearer about
food, gas lines, pollution, etc.?
Ralph Nader is a faker as a car expert. How much else
is he faking as well?
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